Missed Opportunities Are Everywhere

 

Do You Know What You’re Missing When You’re Not Present?

If you’re not present in the here and now, you’re missing a lot.

Are you present as you go about your day?

Often, we simply go through the motions, not giving our full attention to what we’re doing. For many activities, like brushing our teeth, that makes sense. We don’t have to concentrate on routine tasks like that.

But we can’t let that carry over to everything we do. When we’re on autopilot, we’re not fully present. You can’t just show up and think that’s enough.

And what happens when we aren’t present? We miss opportunities.

Many of us are so caught up in our day-to-day routine we miss the opportunities in front of us.

We don’t see them, they’re there, but we’re almost blind to them. They don’t register.

Missed Opportunities Are Everywhere

I told her to be on the lookout for an opportunity, one that was right under her nose. She didn’t know what I was talking about. So, I told her to keep her eyes open. She went about her business, even looking inside the closet to find a toy for the dog, and didn’t see the opportunity that was waiting there for her.

Because she wasn’t really present.

I told her to go back to the closet and look again. She laughed when I told her she was missing an opportunity.

Then she saw it. A box. A heavy box. With her name on it.

She ripped open the box and screamed. The box contained a MacBook Pro.

I’d made her day, but she nearly missed it, just from not being present.

It happens to all of us. I’m sure you’ve been driving, and all of a sudden, realize you’ve traveled a block or two and didn’t remember consciously doing it. You weren’t paying attention to the street, but somehow you managed to drive on autopilot.

Say Goodbye to Multitasking

But when we have our eyes open and our minds in the present, focused on just one thing, we can see the opportunities that are all around us.

You may be thinking that’s all well and good, but we have to multitask in our high-tech, fast-paced world. We can’t be fully present for just one thing.

Nothing could be further from the truth. You can step back, slow down. And be fully present in what you are doing. You may surprise yourself to find you’ll finish each task quicker, just by concentrating on one thing.

You’ll find you’re more creative. You’ll be less likely to be analyzing or judging and appreciate the world around you more. When you get off autopilot, you’ll recapture some of the wonders of looking at a sunset or using the latest technology. Things that were dull routine take on a new fascination.

When you’re in the present, you’re less likely to be worrying and stressing yourself out over things that happened in the past or might occur in the future. All that worry and stress are just distractions from living your life.

If you take this idea into being present with the people around you, your relationships will improve. Instead of dwelling on the past or fearing the future, think about the present. What you and the people you are with are doing and saying right now. You’ll listen better, and the people around you will sense that and appreciate it.

And being present can even add some playfulness into your life.

Five Ways to Be Present

But how do you go about being present? Here are five ways to get started.

1. Breathe Deeply

Take the time to focus on a few slow, deep breaths. Think about what you’re doing as you inhale, hold it for a few seconds, and exhale.

You’ll find this is rather hard to do while paying attention to something else. Just this simple act of controlled and deliberate breathing can force you into the present.

2. Wiggle Your Toes

Yes, go ahead, move your toes. This works on the same principle as deep breathing. It’s hard to move your toes while you’re doing something else. And as a bonus, unless you’re barefoot or wearing sandals, you can do this without anyone else noticing.

It may seem like a silly thing to do. But just a minute or two of toe wiggling can plant you in the present.

3. Take a Break from Electronics

You’ve most likely heard this before. Don’t have your phone on the table while you’re having dinner with someone. And put the phone down while you’re talking with someone.

The idea behind it is simple. If we are touching something, we’ll often start thinking about using it.

Go ahead, pick up a pair of scissors. What comes to mind? You probably are already thinking about cutting something.

The same goes for your phone. When you hold it, you start to think about checking your email. Or your social media. Or you are looking up the score of last night’s game.

When you do all those things, you’re not present. So, put down the phone and be present.

4. Turn off Notification

Take things one step further and shut off the notifications on your phone. The first benefit is that you’ll cut out a lot of distractions.

But you’ll also remove the temptation to look at them. Think about it. Do you really need to read your email every time you get a new message? Or check notifications every time your phone signals you?

You don’t. In nearly every instance, your life won’t suffer if you don’t respond immediately.

So, if you can, get rid of all the notifications. You can always check them later. Free yourself up to focus on being present for what’s most important to you now.

Now, if there are people in your life that you always want to get through to you, you can arrange that. Simply set up a do not disturb passthrough list on your phone in your settings. Calls from anyone on the list will always ring. Even when your phone is on, do not disturb. All the rest will go to voice mail.

5. Focus on What Really Matters Right Now

Instead of letting your to-do list become a distraction, free yourself from it. Figure out what is the most important thing you need to do right now. The thing that matters the most.

Then pay attention only to that one thing. Let the rest go.

Then you’ll be present for that one task. You’ll be able to finish it more efficiently. And by concentrating on it, your eyes will be open to the opportunities it offers.

Opportunities are all around us. Don’t overlook them. Take the time to be present and take note of the opportunities that wait for you to discover.

Is Social Media Toxic?

Everyone says social media is toxic. But is that true?

Perhaps you’ve heard this before. That all you find on social media is negativity spewed by toxic people.

Well, unfortunately, in one sense that can be more of a reflection on you than it is on social media.

Because social media is a mirror of who you are as a person.

How can that be? You know you’re not a toxic person. So, what gives?

It’s because all the social media platforms are run by algorithms.

The algorithms are only presenting in your feed the kind of content that you’ve interacted with. If you’ve liked something, commented on something, or watched a video to the end, the algorithms are taking note.

So the more that you’re interacting or engaging with a type of content, the more that type will be served to you, whether it’s positive or negative. The algorithm doesn’t care.

It’s just trying to serve you more of the content that you engage with. The more engaged you are, the more time you’ll spend on the platform. And the longer you are on the platform, the more ads they can show you, which makes more money for them.

At the end of the day, that’s really what their purpose is as a business. To make money for themselves.

Which is why content with the most likes, shares, and comments gets the most exposure.
The problem is that the most sensational content is the kind that gets the most attention. Which creates a trap for users. We get sucked into looking at the sensational stuff, whether it’s toxic or not.

And we all want the social approval of likes and comments, so we start posting sensational content. Then we’re depressed when no one likes our latest post.

That’s the big problem. We engage with toxic content and end up producing some without realizing it. That’s why we feel social media is a toxic swamp.

The good news is we don’t have to stay there.

If you’re feeling that social media is a waste of time or that you’re only surrounded by negativity or by toxic people, then that means you might want to change the type of content you personally engage with.

Everybody’s homepage, everybody’s feed, everybody’s content that the algorithm serves to them is completely different from what is served to the next person.

And that content is all based on the items or the content that they engage with.

If you’re finding that there’s a ton of negativity on your feed, all you have to do is change the type of content you follow and engage with. Try following inspirational or motivational people.

Or seek out things that you’re interested in, whether it’s cooking, traveling, or theme parks. Whatever you’re interested in, somebody’s created an account or page for that.

And there’s a community out there for that. The more you start engaging with that community, the more you start following, and watching that type of content, the more the social media platform is going to serve up to you things that will be of value and benefit to your life. You’ll see less and less of the toxic content that only wastes your time.

Because after all, if what you’re reading isn’t productive and helping your life in some way, then it is a complete waste of time.

Reading something of value and helping you in life is very different than being dragged down by toxic negativity.

Which is worse than simply wasting your time. Many studies have shown that social media’s potential to be toxic can have severe mental health implications. That’s not something you need in your life.

So do what you can to change your feed to something more positive and healthy.

And this just doesn’t have to be about business. For example, I post a lot of content about business, but I also post about motivation, entrepreneurship, and personal development.

But if those topics don’t attract your attention, you can follow accounts that are related to the items that you are interested in.

The idea is to mold the social media platforms to work for you so that you receive value out of them. Change what you receive so it’s not just a time suck.

You don’t have to lose time scrolling endlessly just seeing what a couple of friends are up to or some of the food that they’re eating and not receiving any value.

Instead, you could be working the algorithm to serve value, like great cooking tips. Or point you to accounts that will teach you cooking techniques or offer healthy (or completely decadent) recipes. That way your time on social media can be productive and teach you something.

So if you think that social media is a waste of time, then take a look at your feed. Think about the kinds of content you engage with. That’s what the algorithm is serving you.

If you want to change the kind of content you’re getting, take action to change that. And it’s not that hard.

Consider what kind of content you want to receive. Let’s say you want budget travel tips.

Do a quick search on Facebook or Twitter (or whatever your favorite platform is) for budget travel.

The platforms will suggest several pages or accounts for you to like or follow. Pick a few you like, and then start engaging with their content. Like it, comment on it, share.

Pretty soon that kind of content will take up much more of the space in your feed.

And you won’t have the sense that social media is all toxic negativity. Nor will it be a waste of your time.

And you can take it one step further by considering the kind of content you create and post. Instead of going for quantity, think quality. In other words, instead of trying to post all the time, be a little more thoughtful about it. Post only meaningful content.

Back in the day people constantly made fun of those who returned from a vacation and invited all their friends over to watch hours of vacation slides. Posting a picture of every five minutes of your life is just like that, and equally tedious and boring.

So forget posting every plate of food you eat. Just post the one with an incredible, jaw-dropping presentation. Try to post only things that will help foster a meaningful connection with family and friends. Don’t worry about anyone else. The idea of social media should be to help us connect with each other and to learn from each other. Not to get into a popularity contest or to see how much negativity we can spew.

And that’s how you can solve the biggest problem of toxic social media.